i don't plan on having that self control this summer
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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