I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
