my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
