Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
I have post one night stand depression
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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