You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Randomize
