Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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