I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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