im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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