have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
