i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
