I was high as a kite when I got pulled over by a cop and he asked me for my ID and if I had been smoking weed, I said no and gave him my debit card.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
