I wish I could teleport
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
