Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
