She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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