I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize
