oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
