i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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