In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
