And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
