Midget sex pt 2 tonight
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
