I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
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