That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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