I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
