State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
i now understand why vodka
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
