I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize