MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
