Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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