it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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