I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
