i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
