I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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