I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Randomize
