What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
