Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
