Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
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