Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize