CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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