I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
