i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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