Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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