i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
