Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
They should really pass out barf bags in church
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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