Your dad touched me again.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
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