I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
