You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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