My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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