just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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