i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
