office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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