she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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