It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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